Ekonomske šale

autora/ice cronomy

Jučerašnji post je bio prvo aprilska šala. Čisto da rasčistim ako ima još sumnjivih misli. Pod tags stoji “1. April”, no izgleda da sam ipak potaknuo razmišljana i sumnju. Dobro, neka bude toga više. Samo vi komentirajte. Da nastavim u duhu šala, evo par ekonomskih. Stila….

“Trošak života u Hrvatskoj raste ubrzano posljednjih mjeseci, no potražnja za njime ne opada.”

Za naše političare.

“Priča je jeftina. Ponuda premašuje potražnju.”

Ostale su na engleskom.

– Economics is the painful elaboration of the obvious.

– An economist is a trained professional paid to guess wrong about the economy. An econometrician is a trained professional paid to use computers to guess wrong about the economy.

– An economist is someone who gets rich explaining others why they are poor.

– An Indian-born economist once explained his personal theory of reincarnation to his graduate economics class. “If you are a good economist, a virtuous economist,” he said, “you are reborn as a physicist. But if you are an evil, wicked economist, you are reborn as a sociologist.” – from the preface to Paul Krugman’s book, “Peddling Prosperity: Economic Sense and Nonsense in the Age of Diminished Expectations” (1994, page xi):

– An economist is someone who doesn’t know what he’s talking about – and make you feel it’s your fault.

– The definition of “waste”: a busload of economists plunging over a precipice with three of the seats unoccupied.

– Following story is to demonstrate some possible implications of the above statement. Two stangers, a man and a woman, meet in a cafe, the man asks.
“My Dear, would you go to bed with me for a million dollars?”
“Well, yes, I guess I would.”
“How about $100?”
“What kind of person do you think I am?”
“My Dear, we have already established that. We are merely haggling over the price!”

According to Ross Emmet, the story was told by George Bernard Shaw. The man and woman are Winston Churchill and Lady Astor and the incident allegedly did occur.

Q:Why did God create economists ?

A:In order to make weather forecasters look good.

An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn’t happen today. by Laurence J. Peter

Two economists meet on the street. One inquires, “How’s your wife?” The other responds, “Relative to what?”

I asked an economist for her phone number….and she gave me an estimate.

Economic forecasters assume everything, except responsibility.

In Canada there is a small radical group that refuses to speak english and no one can understand them. They are called separatists. In this country (USA) we have the same kind of group. They are called economists.

Osobno najdraža.

FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.
SOCIALISM: You have two cows. State takes one and give it to someone else.
COMMUNISM: You have two cows. State takes both of them and gives you milk.
FASCISM: You have two cows. State takes both of them and sell you milk.
NAZISM: You have two cows. State takes both of them and shoot you.
PURE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.
REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.
BUREAUCRACY: You have two cows. State takes both of them, kill one and spill the milk in system of sewage.
CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

Za više šala googlajte Economics Jokes. Prva dva tri linka sadrže sve ove i više.

Oglasi

2 komentara to “Ekonomske šale”

  1. Meni su osobno najdraže ona s cjenkanjem i ona s “Relative to what?” Mora da se malo previše bavim poslovnim planiranjem u zadnje vrijeme…

  2. Bolje poslovno planirati, nego društveno…..

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